At some point in any relationship, regardless of the type (friends, family, dating, etc), there will be an argument (or disagreement, if you'd prefer) about something.

Most of the time, getting through these disagreements will be perfectly simple - e.g. we'll go where you want to go now, i really don't care that much.

But sometimes, the resolution is so very far from simple. Maybe you're deciding how many kids you want to have, or how to handle a loved one's funeral, or some other issue that's really serious and personal to both people involved, so no one wants to "let the other person win".

What do we do in these situations?

First. We have to realize that "winning" isn't always getting what we want.

Yes, there are times that we should fight for the things we want, even if the other person is passionately opposed. Like, if you're baby's father is a deadbeat and doesn't want to pay child support, you should fight for your child through the courts. Your child's life is more important than the father's desire to not be involved.

But, in other situations, even if we are really committed to our position on something, it's not always worth it to win.

We need to weigh the costs of pursuing our position wholeheartedly against the costs of losing that relationship.

Is it really worth fighting over what Mama will wear at her funeral if it means you never talk to your sisters again?


Second. We have to see that compromising or "letting the other person win" isn't a sign of weakness. It's a sign of strength.

Maybe you're reading this and thinking, "you're just telling yourself it's a sign of strength to make yourself feel better". But that's not true.

Here's why.

This is where the goats come in...

There are two goats on a very very thin mountain path. One goat is going up the mountain. The other goat is coming down.

Eventually, they meet in the middle of a very long mountainous path, and now, they're stuck.

There's no space for the goats to pass each other on either side because if they try, one would most definitely fall off the side of the mountain.

So what do they do??

Of course, one goat could kick the other goat off of the mountain and keep going on his journey...but what if you're not the goat that gets to stay on the mountain? that would be kinda sad... So, that's not really a viable solution.

The solution is that one goat has to lie down so that the other goat can step over him. Then, the goat that lied down, gets up and they both continue on their journeys.

What we see here is that it takes a very mature person to realize that lying down, when necessary, doesn't make you a doormat and doesn't mean that you won't also reach your goals.

Because the goat who lied down in that one instance isn't necessarily doing that every day (and just because he's a strong Christian goat doesn't mean that he should allow himself to be walked over all the time for the sake of others).

But he realizes that, in some instances, it's important to humble yourself for the sake of the relationship and for the sake of the journey.

This is exactly what Jesus did for us.

The King of Kings, who had never done anything wrong, decided that His goal of saving the world from eternal damnation was more important than the pain and suffering He'd endure by becoming a man and dying on the cross.

That amount of humility is far greater than that goat on the mountain went through to lay down for 5 seconds to let another goat step over him. And yet, maybe you're reading this and still convinced that it should be someone else who should let you step over them.

Though we're not as perfect as Jesus, His perfection should be our goal. And in trying to meet that goal, we should aim to show at least this small portion of humility, when necessary, to those around us.